Black hair problems….

I need to vent.

I love my natural hair. Anyone who knows me will tell you that. I love it so much I blog about it, talk about it and spend money on it (not too much of course). I invest time and effort into making it looks good and feels good. It doesn’t always look how I would like it to or feel as great as I’d love it to, but I wear it like a crown.

Lately though, to be honest, I am so damn frustrated with it!!! When I stretch it with my fingers and see how it tapers towards the ends, or when I twist it and see how my edges refuse to grow as fast as the rest of my hair, or how it looks nothing like the perfect pictures of other natural ladies online, I just feel like taking a pair of scissors and chopping it all off. All of it. Every single damn strand.

I want it to grow but more importantly I want it to grow healthily, I can’t be doing all this hair stuff and have nothing to show for it. I know I’ve made mistakes along the way, and that’s ok because I was learning. I only really started making progress this past year (after 2 years of being natural!!). I feel kind of embarrassed admitting that because I often meet people who ask for advice about hair. I feel like I shouldn’t be giving advice if my own crown is not in order.

As I type this I am fighting the urge to go to a salon not far from here and do a second big chop…

I’m mad at myself too because it shouldn’t be this serious right? It’s just hair! But it feels so so so serious. It’s such a struggle to love your hair this much and not have it meet your expectations. I’m definitely never picking up a box of relaxer though so I have to work with what I have. Do more research and change up my routine and hope that fixes a few things (especially those badly tapered ends!)

But as much as I may not like the state of my hair currently, it’s encouraging when I hear people tell me how beautiful it is and how healthy it looks and so on. Your compliments are not lost on me, they keep me going. So thank you to every one of you silent and non silent readers who have paid me a compliment at one point in time.

My 3 year nappiversary rolls around next month (October) and I’m not excited about it. I might just end up celebrating it with a cut…joking.

Venting over.

Sigh, black hair problems.

Feb 2012
Feb 2012
September 2013

8 Comments Add yours

  1. Nokx says:
    Hi Ms B. Check out Aisha’s (myfroandi) similar problem and how she went through with it. Good luck. I know this frustration all too well. Askies.

    1. Ms Z. says:

      Hi. Yes i saw her post when she wrote it. I feel like i want to start from scratch though. I already went through the trim that removed damaged ends but i seem to still have problems with the thinning of the ends. Currently my plan is to braid it in a week or 2, keep it braided for 2-3 months then remove them and trim again. I’ll keep doing that till I’m happy.

  2. Kate says:

    What tapered ends??

    1. Ms Z. says:

      See how thin my hair suddenly becomes half way down the strand? That’s the tapering I’m referring to. It happens to everyone’s hair but it’s not supposed to be that extreme.

  3. Tumelo says:

    I think we have experience slumps and frustrations every now and then. Some take longer to get over, but in the end its just hair and you do kinda beat yourself up like why am I worked up over hair? Lol. Keep strong; you’ll get through this.

    1. Ms Z. says:

      Thank you! It’s so encouraging to know I’m not alone! 🙂

  4. matlhodi says:

    All the time I was reading this post all I could do was nod as I’m in the same boat. I know I could get shot for saying this but I honestly think us type 4s have it worse. Having said that, I feel sexy with my fro out…even sexier with the shrunk length I always get tempted to chop it down to twa length (Lira length). I honestly see lots of growth on yours over the years than I do on mine…yup…blame it on the hair dye

    Forward we go honey! TWA or BSL (ambition speaking).

    1. Ms Z. says:

      Yeah we do have it worse if I dare say so too. It’s a hard texture to work with and requires more work than other textures. I feel sexy with it out too which is why I want it so big people behind me have to stand on their toes to see in front of me, hahahaha!!! But yes bad choices early on have slowed me down and one of them is that hair dye! I have to keep myself away from it!

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s